I’m finally revisiting the characters from The River City Chronicles nine years after their original timeline. I’ll be running the series weekly here on my blog, and then will release it in book form at the end of the run. Hope you enjoy catching up with all your faves and all their new secrets!
Today, we find out what happened to Brad…
< Read Chapter 12 | Read Chapter 14 >
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Chapter Thirteen
Meanwhile, In Tucson…
Sam sat next to the empty hospital bed, squeezing the faux-wooden armrests of his chair so hard his knuckles were white.
A couple orderlies had come by a half hour earlier to cart off Brad’s body, as if it were a thing of no consequence whatsoever. They’d been serious and respectful as they lifted the lifeless form onto a stretcher, but as soon as they’d left the room, he’d heard them talking while they pushed the transport gurney down the hall, taking it to the morgue. Taking him to the morgue.
“Was that Sam Fuller?”
“I think so. My mom reads his books.” A pause. “Then who’s this?”
“Must be his husband.”
“Holy shit…” The voices faded.
Sam stared hard at the empty space where Brad had last been. It was hard to think of that pale, crumpled body, hands clasped over the blue hospital gown, as the Brad he’d been married to for nine years. The guy he’d shared his bed, his life, even his dreams with.
The white sheets were pulled back and crumpled, as if Sam’s husband had just gotten up to go to the bathroom, and might come padding back in his hospital socks at any moment.
Sam sat back, templing his fingers and breathing into his hands while looking around the brightly painted golden hospital room. A sunset scene of A-Mountain dominated the far wall, and the heart monitor was silent now, the drip line dangling sad and alone from its holder.
The Arizona sun through the window was warm on his right shoulder. If he turned to look outside, he was sure he would see people scurrying along on the sidewalk below, going about their daily business. The world felt calm. Normal.
Why isn’t everything falling to pieces? Why aren’t I? Because he knew that if he let himself cry right now, he might never stop.
His phone buzzed in his pocket. Sam pulled it out and stared at it blankly.
You all right? A text from his friend Alex.
He stared at it for a couple minutes before responding. Not sure. Words deserted him.
*hugs* Gio will be there soon. Alex, Gio, and his other friends had been tag-teaming him since Brad had landed in the hospital, three days earlier. One of them was almost always there with him.
Thanks. He should feel grateful. Angry. Wounded. Betrayed.
He should feel something. Anything but this bland, flat numbness that threatened to smother him.
He put the phone down on the small table next to a potted pincushion cactus and leaned forward to brush his fingers over the sheets. Still warm, but the heat was fading fast. “Fuck.”
A blood clot. Small as the head of a pin. That’s all it had taken to rip away the one person he loved most in this world.
The numbness suffocating his heart cracked open just a little, and he gasped for air as the room spun around him.
“Sam?”
Blinking back tears, he looked up to find Gio, one of his oldest friends in Tucson, poking his head into the room. They’d met when Sam was a student at the University.
Tucson Gio. Not the Sacramento one. Funny the places the mind went when you didn’t want to think about the one thing you couldn’t stop thinking about.
Gio’s gaze went to the empty bed, and then back to Sam. “Oddio.” He crossed the room in two bounds and threw his arms around his friend. “I’m so, so sorry.” His embrace was warm, should have been comforting, but it just reminded him of the bed-that-was-no-longer-warm and the events of the last few days and Brad and everything—
“Fuuuuuuuck!” He wrapped his arms around his friend and the numbness dissolved, replaced by a primal pain so intense it made him curl his toes in his shoes. “I’m not ready. Bring him back. Goddammit, I’m not ready to lose him.” His vision blurred as hot tears coursed down his face, and he squeezed his friend even harder. “Bring him back.”
“He loved you so much, amico.” Gio was as lost as he was.
“Goddammit.” Sobs wracked Sam’s body, the tempest he’d kept at bay since that last beep of the heart monitor taking over him completely.
Memories flashed through his mind—Brad in the Senator’s office in Sacramento. Their wedding day at Ragazzi. The happy home they’d made together here in Tucson, filled with light and color and love.
Brad, lying motionless on the hospital bed, his face pale as the grave, mouth slack and eyes closed.
A fresh round of sobbing threatened to tear him in half.
Gio held him tightly, riding it out with him.
Every time he thought about Brad, that last image resurfaced, so cold and diminished, and he’d start off again, until he was certain no more tears could come.
He gasped for breath, taking in a huge gulp of air, and his breathing grew slower and slower.
He was suddenly aware what a mess he must be. Eyes red, nose dripping, cheeks puffy. “I’m sorry, Gio. You shouldn’t have to deal with my—”
“Shhhh.” His friend held him tighter. “It’s okay to cry your eyes out. I did the same for my nonna when she passed, late last year.”
Sam squeezed his friend back, and then let Gio go. He felt nauseous. “I think I need to get out of this room.” He swayed, unsteady on his feet, trying to avoid looking at the empty bed.
“I understand. Come on.” Gio took his hand and led him out into the sterile white hallway, down to the waiting room. “Maybe we should go outside for some fresh air—”
“Sammy?”
Sam’s head snapped up. “Mom. But how…?” She wasn’t driving anymore.
She flashed him a sad smile. “Alex came to pick me up.” She approached him cautiously, as if afraid he might break if she moved too fast. Her hand came up to touch his cheek, cupping it gently. “Oh baby, I’m so sorry.”
Brad threw his arms around her. “Oh Momma, what am I going to do?”
For a response, she hugged him tight.
They stayed like that for a long time, her warmth seeping into him as she rocked him back and forth, pushing back the pain. He soaked it up like sunshine. Like when he was a child, and he’d lost his first hamster. Or his first boyfriend. Or when he’d finally gotten up the courage to leave Jameson.
Finally, she loosened her grip, and he let her go.
“When was the last time you ate something?” She looked up at him, her eyes narrowing. “You always forget to eat.”
“Um… I had a sandwich last night…”
“Well, come on then. Food will do you good. I spent a lot of time here when your father was ill, and the cafeteria’s not half bad.”
Sam started to protest that he wasn’t really hungry, but she wouldn’t take no for an answer.
“You going to keep me standing here?” His mother leaned on her cane, playing up the whole I’m an old personthing.
“No, mother.” He hung his head, still seven years old whenever she was around.
She took his hand and dragged him toward the elevator. “And bring your friends. They look too skinny.”
That got a laugh from Alex, who put a hand over his mouth as if he’d committed a grave sin. “Sorry. And she’s right. I ate here when Gio was… sleeping.”
Gio grinned. “You can say ‘in a coma.’ It won’t hurt my feelings.”
Alex took his hand.
Sam allowed himself a brief smile. “Life goes on. I guess. It’s okay.” He gave Alex a hug. “Thanks for bringing her.”
“Of course. I’m so sorry this happened. He was way too young.” Alex kissed his cheek.
Sam closed his eyes, trying not to think of Brad. Of the empty space in his heart. He took a deep breath, finding a precarious balance once more. As long as he didn’t move too fast, or think too much, maybe he could keep himself on an even keel. He let his mother lead the way.
Some things never changed.
And some things would never be the same again.
< Read Chapter 12 | Read Chapter 14 >
Like what you read? if you haven’t tried it yet, check out book one, The River City Chronicles, here.